Gothproxy

What's wrong with me?
Can't sleep.
                Trying to.
Need more pills I guess.
      Hate using them.
          People think I'm off-kilter.
                                            Too old.
                                                             Not attractive nor desirable.
    Wont fall back to old ways.
              Gotta fight.
                                                 Gotta hang on.
                                   Why>?
  Dunno what ive fought for.
        heh,
                      sounding delusional i think.
                                                      but am i more delusional when im half asleep

                                                                    or fully awake....

How can a soul cease to feel
Might as well ask sun not to shine
Or the birds not to sing, when Spring is new

How can a heart beat no more
When desire has fled
And hope burns to ash

How can love fall into nothing
And take with it the pain and longing
Of watching Heaven walk away

When will the body give in to want
To lie still and silent
Knowing nothing but the void
And the caress it gives
To those lost in sorrow
When the morning comes

I cannot believe it.

I just finished reading "The Hunger Games".

Might not sound that impressive except I was only a third of the way into the book when I picked it up again at around 6pm.  I literally could not put it down. No dinner, no bathroom break, not water, no nothing.  It's like the past 6 hours (yeah I'm a slower reader) all my body needed was this book. I cannot say I've been this entranced by a book ever, nor can I recall reading a book faster. Now I have to go put something in my stomach before I throw up.

p.s. If you haven't read this book yet...READ IT!!!   NOW!!!!!



I'm NOT KIDDING!!!!



Stop reading this post and GO READ THIS BOOK!!!!

I got DONUTS!!!

Got off of work, went to my brother's house to take care of his dog (loveable but DAMN he's dumb). Decided I would run by HyVee and grab a couple donuts for around $0.89 a piece. But they had placed the leftover ones in boxes of 6 for $1.50!! I was like SCORE!!!!

I need more moments like that in my life.

Hell, I think EVERYONE needs more moments like that in their lives.

MORE DONUTS FOR EVERYONE!!!!!!

So I really was an artist in a previous life.

Okay, not so much a previous life, but way back when when I wasn't so 'worldly' I went to school for art. I like to think I was good at it. I placed in some shows in middle school and high school and thought I would be an art teacher one day. Funny how life has a way of stepping in and changing all your plans in a heartbeat. **sigh** Oh well.

So here I am, in an artist "blog sphere", and I'm trying to get up the nerve to draw again. Now, mind you, I have NO skill with any of the drawing/painting programs out there and Photoshop still taunts me; but maybe, just maybe, I can see about breaking out my pencil set (I still have it after all this time) and start up again. Guess it couldn't hurt...right? Or I can put pictures of my cosplaying in here, since I've seen them on others sites (note: I'm real new to that too so bare with me).

Anyway. Here I am.

Nothing much to say after that.


PAX